Wednesday, October 1, 2008

Your Very Own Roman Siege Engine


On the list of Things-That-Mr Spanky-Wants-To-Own-But-Just-Doesn't-Have-The-Money-For there is a new entry. In Roman times, when you were upset with a neighboring city or just wanted to conquer a town in Gaul you would work with your army and build several siege engines. These were large machines designed to hurl enormous stones at high velocities and generally cause a lot of havoc. Sort of today's version of a cruise missile but much less expensive. Recently, some enterprising souls built their very own gigantic ballista and threw around these stones and then decided that they needed the garage space and so they are selling it on eBay! Phunkidz, this is opportunity knocking. Although my wife might disagree, I definitely know that I could use one of these. It's a man thing.
  • Neighbors playing rock music at 2am and carrying on? No problem.
  • Bully down the street picking on kidz? Covered.
  • Mr Sanchez's cat leaving doo doo on your front lawn? Bring it on.
Of course, Mr. Spanky is only jesting. It is never a good idea to throw large rocks via ballista at your neighbors and fellow human beings. Especially if you are going to get caught. The ballista is not exactly a streamlined getaway vehicle.



Link to Ballista Video

There are some great scenes in the Lord of the Rings trilogy that show siege engines at work. I highly recommend that you watch for the trebuchets mounted on the walls of Gondor as they hurl large chunks of masonry out into the orc armies and squish them like little pesky ants. Excellent movies.

2 comments:

bubba said...

Man alive. I want one of those, eh.

Bob said...

Lots of fun using various siege engines in "Rome Total War".